shorter* david klinghoffer

I bet David Klinghoffer is a HUGE Greco-Roman wrestling fan

I bet David Klinghoffer is a HUGE Greco-Roman wrestling fan

Women will suffer from gay marriage, because once men have a taste** of that sweet succulent manmeat, they can never go back to the pussy. Throbbing, pulsing, swollen ohhh *fapfapfap* OH GOD

For people who claim to be utterly repulsed by teh gheysecks, conservatives sure spend a lot of time obsessing over it. You know what repulses me? Cooked spinach. I spend about 0.0000000007 seconds a day thinking about it.

*”Shorter” concept stolen from Sadly, No!.

**In the mythical Eisenhower-era fantasy world these loons inhabit, no one fucks before getting a ring on their finger. Also lesbians do not exist, unless you count the drunken sorority sluts licking each other’s nipples for a free t-shirt on Girls Gone Wild.

speaking of ol’ governor moonbeam…

California social conservatives (all 3 of them–hey-o!) are whining that Attorney General Jerry Brown has changed the ballot wording of Prop 8, the pending proposition that seeks to permanently strip gay California residents of their civil rights by making it illegal for them to marry each other.

Of course, social conservatives prefer not to state the plain fact and instead pussyfoot around their bigotry by claiming they’re just trying to protect the sacred institute of marriage. You know, that thing you can do with a falling-down drunk trampstamped sorority sister you met at Glitter Gulch an hour ago, then get dissolved the next day. Yeah, it’s one of America’s most cherished rituals, can’t have the nasty sodomites mucking around in it.

The wording now runs as thus:

Proposition 8

Changes California Constitution to eliminate right of same-sex couples to marry. Provides that only a marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.

Well, riddle me this: Is there anything about this that is untruthful, misleading, or dishonest? I would apply those adjectives to the original “Blah blah blah protects marriage blah blah traditional family blah blah preserves tradition blee blah” crap that was originally on the ballot, not to this wording.