pat robertson just jumped above fred phelps to the #1 slot on my fundie asshole dead pool

Yog Soggoth, I summon thee!

Hey, there’s been a horrible earthquake in one of the poorest nations on earth, killing (conservatively) 100,000 people. I wonder if Pat Robertson is going to make some horrible statement about how the Haitians only have themselves to blame? Ha ha, just kidding! I didn’t wonder at all, any more than I have to wonder if Fred Phelps will somehow find a way to blame “fags” (his favorite word) for it.

Something happened a long time ago in Haiti and people might not want to talk about. They were under the heel of the French, you know Napoleon the Third and whatever. And they got together and swore a pact to the Devil. They said ‘We will serve you if you will get us free from the Prince.’ True story. And so the Devil said, ‘OK it’s a deal.’ And they kicked the French out. The Haitians revolted and got something themselves free. But ever since they have been cursed by one thing after another.*

“Napoleon the Third and whatever”. AWESOME. The man is a scholar and a poet.

So let’s get this straight: Not only is God pro-slavery, He is also extremely slow to exact His vengeance. Evil AND lazy? Sign me up for THAT religion!

Well, it stands to reason that Robertson would be agin’ the only successful slave revolt in history. After all, he was staunchly pro-apartheid:

I think “one man, one vote”, just unrestricted democracy, would not be wise. There needs to be some kind of protection for the minority which the white people represent now, a minority, and they need and have a right to demand a protection of their rights.**

So Robertson DOES occasionally care about the rights of minorities… so long as they’re white. Of course, that probably had at least as much to do with the profit he got from South African blood diamonds, mined by people who were practically slaves under the apartheid government, than it did with his being such a cheerleader for the enslavement of dark-skinned folk.

It’s time for Pat Robertson to just… go away. Retire, get hit by a train, cut out his own tongue in some sort of religious frenzy, I really don’t care. But his particular brand of evil drivel has no place in the 21st century.


**You can Google it, if you have a hard time believing a so-called Christian could think and say something so heinously wrong.

p.s. Wade Davis’ The Serpent and the Rainbow is a great book on Haiti, with sections equally devoted to the slave revolt that founded it, its modern problems, and its unique religion. (Although it only goes up the ousting of Duvalier, having been published in the 1980s.) And please do not confuse it with the Wes Craven movie of the same name, which bore absolutely nothing other than the title in common with the book.


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