where in the world is governor sanford?

Last seen wearing a red & white striped jersey and bobble hat.

Last seen wearing a red & white striped jersey and bobble hat.

So I guess you’ve probably all been following this whole disappearing South Carolina governor thing. Mark Sanford went a-missin’ the Thursday before Father’s Day, even though he has four kids. His wife said he was “writing something” and probably “wanted to get away from the kids”. She sounds concerned! Then his office reported he was off hiking all 67 bazillion miles of the Appalachian Trail; which is ironic, because he had tried to reject stimulus money that would have helped keep it up, before being forced to take it by the state Supreme Court. Also: Sunday was “Naked Hiking Day” on the Appalachian Trail. HMMM. Then he got in touch with his office, and after expressing shock that people would be concerned when the governor dumps his cell phone and flits off without so much as a Post-It stuck to the fridge, said he’d changed his mind at the last minute and decided to fly to Argentina. Because secret last-minute trips to South America are not at all suspicious.

Of course, it turns out he was off porking some broad the whole time. This is pretty much the most normal thing any Republican politician has ever done.

Hey, what’s that smoke? It appears to be coming from Governor Sanford’s 2012 ambitions as it goes up in flames!

Bonus lulz: The Daily Show‘s Wyatt Cenac says Sanford better wander out of the woods leading a pack of boyotes if he wants to compete with other GOP scandals.

ETA: I see Faux News has learned absolutely nothing from that time they claimed page-diddling Mark Foley was a Democrat:

mark foley is a democrat

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Marybell
    Jun 21, 2012 @ 10:55:22

    I thought about Mark Sanford and all his escapades. I could not find any current info on him- did he marry his lover – –just what happened to him etc. I know his wife and children suffered

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