i need a long lost rich uncle to kick off and leave me a fortune, so i can afford to live alone

What’s worse than an annoying bitch of a housemate who never cleans? An annoying bitch of a housemate who you find cleaning the kitchen with the sponge you use to wash your dishes. This in spite of the fact that we have an entire drawer full of cleaning rags for that specific purpose. I’m pretty sure the entire neighborhood heard me holler WTF.

You know, I am an anal-retentive person. I know that. I like things done a certain way, and maybe I don’t have a right to insist that other people, over whom I exercise no authority, do them that way as well. But I really don’t understand what is so fucking difficult for a seemingly non-retarded adult to grasp about, say, re-filling the ice cube tray when you empty it. Why? Why is that so fucking hard to do? Especially when it’s not even your fucking ice cube tray to begin with??

And when she does clean, the way she cleans makes no god damn sense. Like, she’ll spend 10 minutes wiping down the sides of the island that the stove is on… but not bother to clean the stove top. When she cleans the bathroom, she’ll always polish the medicine cabinet mirror… but she’s never once scrubbed out the toilet.

Now I’m wondering if she’s ever used my toothbrush to clean between the bathroom tiles.


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