i’ll give you something to cry about


Tamera Jo Freeman was on a Frontier Airlines flight to Denver in 2007 when her two children began to quarrel over the window shade and then spilled a Bloody Mary into her lap.

She spanked each on the thigh three times. A flight attendant confronted Freeman, who responded by hurling a few profanities and throwing what remained of a can of tomato juice on the floor.

The incident ultimately led to Freeman’s arrest and conviction for a federal felony defined as an act of terrorism under the Patriot Act, the controversial federal law enacted after the 2001 attacks on New York’s World Trade Center and the Pentagon.

Because what we really need on airplanes is people even more afraid to discipline their unruly brats.

When I flew down to Southern California for my sister’s wedding last fall, I felt someone kicking the back of my chair during the entire boarding procedure. I finally snapped “You need to stop kicking the back of my chair”, only to hear the familiarly wounded tones of the serial breeder whine “The person you’re talking to is 5 years old.” My reply: “Then I guess I’m addressing you, since it’s your job to make him behave.” I heard a lot of sputtering and tsking, but the feral brat stopped his kicking, and that’s all I gave a shit about.

I mean seriously, this brain-dead moomy was sitting inches away from her fuck trophy and did fuck all while he pummeled the back of a seat someone was sitting in. I’m fucking sick and tired of the “My child is a pweshush speshul snowflake and making him act like a human being while in public will crush his soooooul!” attitude.

If it were up to me, the little fuckers would be knocked unconscious and stored down in the baggage hold in cages.


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