i always wanted to be a ronson: harper’s bazaar makes analogy that would have been edgy in 2001 with another weird let’s-pretend photo shoot

Are the editors at Harper’s Bazaar all huffing compressed gas duster? First they foist the horror show of Tyra pretending to be Michelle Obama on us; now they’re trying to make us care about the Ronson siblings by comparing them to the Tenenbaum kids. No, seriously.

The parallel between the Ronsons and the quirky prodigies, Chas, Margot, and Richie Tenenbaum, of the 2001 Wes Anderson-directed dramedy The Royal Tenenbaums isn’t just a clever concept. All are products of an unusual upbringing and artistic environment.

Yes totally, if Royal had managed rock bands and Etheline had married that guy from Foreigner instead of a sweet accountant.

Did Sarah Cristobal ever actually watch the movie beyond the opening credits, or did she have to stop to write some ridiculous puffpiece about how the Osborne kids are just like the Pevensie children?? Because it’s about how these gifted kids totally didn’t live up to their potential and turned out to be utter failures and deeply unhappy people.

Also, Charlotte and Mark would have to be secretly in love for the analogy to work.

Publications like Harper’s are an endless source of amusement to me, because they enable me to get a peek inside the alien thought processes of the richest, whitest 1%. They really think the Ronsons are “rock aristocracy” because Samantha is a DJ, Mark produced Amy Winehouse’s album, and Charlotte… uh… throws really good parties.

Whereas if you pulled 100 normal people off the street and asked them what they knew about the Ronsons, probably all that 99 of them could come up with is that Samantha is probably banging Lindsay Lohan.

Now, everybody knows that you have to be relatively noteworthy to have a pictorial in a magazine. What Harper’s Bazaar presupposes is: maybe you don’t?

I just had to quote this comment from the Best Week Ever post, because I’ve been laughing about it for the past ten minutes.

Kids, David Bowie is coming over for tea.

Kids, David Bowie is coming over for tea.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: Amy Winehouse | this would have been a totally edgy analogy back in 2001

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