There are many things hilariously wrong about this cover — indeed, about the whole Twilight phenom — but I think the one I most want answered right now is: Why on earth is Edward/Robert’s belt buckled on the side??
Also, his hair is… unfortunate. Is that on purpose? Is it going to look like that for the whole movie??
Edward in the sunlight was shocking. I couldn’t get used to it, though I’d been staring at him all afternoon. His skin, white despite the faint flush from yesterday’s hunting trip, literally sparkled, like thousands of tiny diamonds were embedded in the surface. He lay perfectly still in the grass, his shirt open over his sculpted, incandescent chest, his scintillating arms bare. His glistening, pale lavender lids were shut, though of course he didn’t sleep. A perfect statue, carved in some unknown stone, smooth like marble, glittering like crystal.
There’s basically nothing about Twilight that I don’t find utterly ridiculous, but yet somehow it fascinates me. The books are just so terribly-written, they literally are like fancfiction — bad fanfiction (the use of 3 adjectives where one will do; the minute description of clothing and hairstyles; the way everything is told by the first-person narrative, rather than shown through the dialogue or circumstance) — with Bella as the ultimate Mary Sue.
And the more you criticize them, the more hysterical its legions of 12-year-old-girl fans will get. If you venture into the comments of any Twilight-related post on ONTD, they’re almost immediately inundated with scathing comments from haters and histrionic defenses in glittery, 48-point text.
It’s very amusing, how furiously worked up and divided some people get over something with absolutely no real importance or consequences.
Edit: I’m not going to be approving any more shittily-spelled CAPSLOCK whines from Twatlighters. So any 12-year-old girls and grown women who really should know better who are flocking here to piss and moan about how not everyone thinks these stupid books are better than unicorn porn can fuck off and go write some Jacob/Edward slashfic, or whatever it is that you fill all the time not spent dating on.