someone should have paid attention in his ancient history class, instead of doodling racist crap on his trapper keeper

Some smarmy jerk who is also the son of a Republican running for the Colorado Senate caused some trouble for his dad this week when news of his hilariously racist Facebook page broke. Oops!
Anyway, I mention it not because I care about Colorado politics, or have taken it upon myself to upbraid every member of the [...]

“get married or you’ll die alone surrounded by cats!”

It is scientifically proven that all single women spend their weekends alone, crying into pints of Chunky Monkey.
What brain-melting chemicals has Stefanie Marsh been huffing? In this hysterical diatribe for the “Relationships” section of the Times Online, she basically resorts to making shit up to prove you’re some kind of freak for being a withered old spinster.
Likewise, there’s a [...]

working on your car to save money is so elitist!

That out-of-touch crazy elitist Barack Obama has suggested that all Americans should make sure their tires are properly inflated to save gas. Ha ha, stupid, right?! Newt Gingrich called it “loony tunes” and the McCain campaign is offering an “Obama tire pressure gauge” for a $25 donation.
Let’s see what other pinko hippie faggots agree with Senator [...]

old media cautiously sticks its pedicured toe into this “blogging” thing all the kids are talking about

With all the trepidation of my grandfather sitting down to the Atari 2600 for a rousing game of “The Pac-Man”, Condé Nast has made its first foray into the blogosphere. They’ve launched a trio of sites they refer to as “The Network”, dedicated to dieting, skincare, and sex.
But the dinosaurs at CN don’t seem to [...]